Amanda is 10 years old.

She used to be silly, talkative, and playful. But lately, something’s changed.

Amanda’s parents are in the middle of a high-conflict divorce. At school, her teacher notices she’s quieter. Her grades are slipping. She cries easily, struggles to sleep, and often complains of headaches or stomachaches. At home, neither parent knows quite how to reach her. Amanda seems distant—disconnected from both of them.

Eventually, her school counselor recommends therapy due to signs of emotional distress and ongoing parental conflict.

When Amanda walks into therapy—small, tired, and guarded—she shares:

“I’m just so tired of the fighting. I feel like I have to be two different people. At Mom’s house, I have to be mad at Dad. At Dad’s house, I have to pretend everything is okay. But it’s not.”

She explains that her mom cries every day. She overhears conversations about how her dad “ruined everything” by cheating. She’s told she shouldn’t love him anymore. But she still does—and she’s confused.

At Dad’s house, she’s hesitant. She worries about leaving Mom alone. She’s not just a kid anymore—she’s become her mother’s emotional support.

And then it gets worse.

Dad tells Amanda:

“Tell your mom I’m not picking you up next weekend.”

Mom says:

“Can you remind your dad he still hasn’t paid child support?”

Amanda has become the messenger. The buffer. The emotional caretaker. The go-between.
And she’s breaking under the pressure.

<strong>When the Court Recommends Therapy for a Child</strong>

Amanda’s story is, unfortunately, far too common.

When courts recommend therapy during custody proceedings, it’s often because a child’s emotional well-being is deteriorating due to parental conflict, instability, or high-stress transitions. At Stonebridge Counseling, we’ve created a clear and compassionate process to support children and families during these difficult times.

<strong>The Intake Process: Step-by-Step</strong>

1. Court Recommends Therapy
   A judge or attorney suggests counseling for the child based on concerns about emotional distress or family conflict.

2. Consent Requirements
   If parents share joint legal custody, both must provide written consent before therapy can begin—especially for children under 12.

3. Choosing a Clinician
   Once consent is obtained, we assign a therapist who specializes in working with children and families experiencing separation, divorce, or other significant transitions.

4. Required Documentation

• A Caregiver Affidavit confirms who can be involved in the child’s therapy.

• A copy of the current custody order helps us understand legal boundaries and communication expectations.

5. Therapy Begins
Our sessions provide a safe, consistent space where the child can process emotions, rebuild trust, and develop healthy coping strategies.

<strong>What Parents Should Know</strong>

• The therapist is here for the child—not to mediate between parents.

• We follow a no-secrets policy in cases of joint legal custody. Both parents receive general updates about progress, attendance, and scheduling—but not private session content, unless safety is at risk.

• Children should never be used as messengers. Relaying information through your child may feel convenient in the moment, but it places enormous emotional weight on them and can result in long-term damage.

<strong>Why This Matters in the Long Run</strong>

Children like Amanda are at risk of developing insecure or disorganized attachment styles when exposed to chronic parental conflict. This can lead to:

• Chronic anxiety or depression

• Trouble trusting others

• Fear of abandonment or rejection

• Poor emotional regulation

• Relationship struggles in adulthood

Amanda doesn’t need to be the adult in the room.
She needs space to feel safe, to be a child again, and to heal—with the support of a therapist and two parents committed to her well-being.

<strong>What We Offer at Stonebridge Counseling</strong>

We provide trauma-informed, compassionate care that includes:

• Child therapy for anxiety, depression, emotional dysregulation, and divorce-related stress

• Parent consultations to help caregivers better understand their child’s needs

• Co-parenting support (if both parties are willing) to reduce conflict and foster healthier family dynamics

Separate therapy services for parents navigating personal challenges related to the divorce or custody process

<strong>Take the Next Step</strong>

If your family is going through a custody battle and your child is showing signs of emotional distress, we’re here to help.

Let’s work together to protect their childhood and give them the support they deserve.